Childs Play

I am about to break the Internet. That’s not really true. I have been, however, looking for that unified theory of why the Internet is an essential thing in life. It wasn’t until about 6:30P on Saturday night that I found my answer.

Below is a clip of me when I was 7. 7. The footage is almost 32 years old, and I haven’t seen it since I was, at best, 10 years old. I have not a single piece of recorded audio with my own voice from before my voice changed. I was floored when I saw this.

To set the stage – I went to the Mirman School in Los Angeles. The school was contacted by a game show which wanted to record kids defining words. Those clips would be shown to adults, and they would then have to guess the word. And thus “Childs Play” was born into existence.

I was on the show a handful of times. In fact, the savings bonds from my appearances paid for my first car. I haven’t really thought about it much since I was a child. You know, because I was 7 and 8 when the shows aired. It was long ago pushed out of active memory. In fact, it was written to tape and the tapes were lost.

What is so very incredible about this find, to me anyway, is that it exists at all. Multiple people have gone through the trouble of posting clips and entire episodes of this game show to YouTube. That is amazing to me. Once I discovered one, that it took me 5 minutes to find this clip is astounding. More awesome still (again, from my point of view) was seeing all these other kids from my school as children. Exactly as I remember them. Crazy.

Of all the words I did, this one was the one that was a source of much ribbing from both of my brothers. I was terrible in this one. Awful. I cannot begin to guess how the woman got the word at all, so kudos to her.

I was able to show this to my wife. She has never heard my voice as a child, and pictures are rare. My kids saw this. I am slightly older than my son in this video. I look exactly like my youngest daughter in this video. I sound like a lost little boy in this video. Check out the ‘fro in this video. The busted up and crooked collar. The school emblem on my sweater. It is so many levels of awesome.

But that’s not the best part. For a very small group of people who will see this post, it’s what comes after me that makes this so so priceless. I mean BEYOND priceless. Straight up click bait worthy priceless. Mary Jo and Paul, I give you a gift. Sascha, I’m sorry. Remember, this video is from 1983, and he and I were on opposite sides of the country as school kids. We met at one point during later tapings for a change the producers made to the show, but it was 30+ years later that I was sitting next to Sascha during a press briefing for Windows Phone. Yes. That Sascha. He was on a lot. A lot, a lot. Sascha, you were so charismatic and great in all of the videos, but this one – oh to have had a chance to know you better as a child.

Please be kind…remember, anything you say, you are saying about children. Sure, I’m a grown man now, but please be kind to the kids. The kids! Remember, the world is indeed a very, very small place. You never know when you might run into people again.